What can I tell you about my life to give God Glory?
I never pre-prepare my posts.
They come from as I am sure most of the bloggers, from the heart
I admit I have to spell check because one of my weak points is grammar as English is my second language.
I am going far back when I was 15, old and my parents sent me away to London as an Au pair girl.
Coming from Italy, with no experience at all, I took a ferry the was called Nigth Ferry that brought me the from France to the white cliffs of Dover.
The first job the agency found for me was a nice couple that picked me up with a few month old baby but I blew it because I was overwhelmed by the baby crying and called my parents every day that naturally cost them a fortune.
I di not truly realize the cost, I was just desperate not speaking English at all.
I had until I was kicked out, a day off, I spent those days walking all over London till my feet hurt, Every few minute I would ask a passerby the time. What time is, please? LOL. also 3 night a week I went to an international school where a bunch of people listens to an English teacher. I had no idea what they were talking about so, those nights I went to a nightclub at 100 Oxford street were they played Jazz, original New Orleans Jazz.
There I met a famous Jazz piano player Anton Purnell from New Orleans.
Well, after 3 weeks on the job, I was terminated!
what a scared little girl I became. I was very proud of what I through was tough but, finding myself alone and, without Job, gave me the courage to ask my parents for help.
They sent me some money, enough for a week at a boarding home for international students. Before receiving their money, I when through a terrible 2 days until I found another job.
I found a boarding house run by an Italian couple. I felt safe as I was waiting for the money to come in.
The boarding house only had a few bedrooms to rent.
There was one bathroom for all.
I was not even 1 full day in the room and I went to take a bath. The bathroom door had no lock so I tried to be quick in case it was needed and nobody knocked.
The door open opening slowly and the husband, the owner of the flat push me down as I was getting out of the tub, I pushed him away and screamed with all the breath I had and he stopped. Immediately I ran out and, the first bedroom I found I started knocking. I was completely naked and shivering in the January cold. They were cheap very little heat, All this I realized later. Finally, the door was open and as I kept watching behind me in fear, they let me in.
I was given something to cover my nakedness with. I forgot if a blanket or towel.
I was told that they knew he was a dirty old man. He was in his 40th I was 15.
I went, followed by one of the young students that opened the door, to my bedroom. I knew he probably had the key so I barricaded myself the best I could by moving the bed and dresser in front of the door. After getting dressed I decided I was NOT going to allow that man to get away with it.
I reopened the bedroom door and ran downstairs to the kitchen where I knew his wife was preparing the evening meal.
I am going to make this short, she did not believe me and told me to get out.
Well, the money was coming by mail so I needed a place for a couple days until it would be available.
As I was packing and getting dressed, you are not going to believe this but, the husband had put a ladder in front of my window and was looking in.
She told me to leave so, I picked up my small suitcase and said to myself bravely, I am out of this place I will be OK.
In the back of my mind, I was praying to Jesus even if after the Orphanage we never went to church, my parent only took me for my first communion and my Confirmation. I loved the white dress my godmother bought me. We were Catholic by name only.
Here, again, I thank God I did not get kidnapped, as it was going on those days the late sixties. as well. I was young pretty then, lol. I had green eyes and a good body since I did a lot of sports and the innocence left in me was visible.
Pretty good for kidnapping and sex slavery.
God always protected me and turned my mistakes around, I made many mistakes.
I did not know where to turn so I decided to let God work for me.I realized how much I was leaning on God in those days.
In tears, I found a Church. I used when I was in the second orphanage to try to find the chapel empty to pray to just God and me.
Unfortunately, the door of the little Church was closed so, I set and tried not to cry and think instead
AS I was sitting on the stairs of the church, people would pass by and never really took a look at me. Hooray, finally a young man stopped by and in a weird accent asked me if I was OK, how u? he was Italian 20 21 years old young man, and, did, and after I told him what happened, offered me to stay with him.
I was so stupid and naive.
There was a tiny cot in the corner of the shabby little studio and after putting down my only suitcase showed me with a finger where I was going to sleep. I was elated and happy to have a place to sleep but, the joy was short-leaved as the same night I felt his body touching mine. I was in that ugly made believe bed half dressed.
Again, as in times before I could not say no and in a little voice I told him I was a virgin.
In my mind and heart, I was but the person that took my virginity took most my innocence as well, but not all of it.
I felt terribly stupid when the young man laughed at me and told me in a mean way a virgin? that I was not. After my first sexual experience, I should have known better but,
I still believed I was a virgin because I did not have intercourse even experienced before. How dumb a 15 years old not so stupid girl can be!
I think I will talk more about this another time. I am crying and thanking God at the same time. I am OK now because I am a child of God, He was with me every minute of the day, keeping me from the worse and I am well today!
The Lord Is My Light and My Salvation
27 The Lord is my light and my salvation;
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life;
of whom shall I be afraid?
2 When evildoers assail me
to eat up my flesh,
my adversaries, and foes,
it is they who stumble and fall.