“Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched?” Proverbs 6:28
The surest way to avoid an affair is to flee temptation as soon as it confronts you. Author Jerry Jenkins has referred to this determination to preserve moral purity as “building hedges” around marriage so that temptation is never given a foothold. You take steps to protect yourself and enhance the trust level in your marriage at the same time.
How? Talk with your partner about your interactions with the opposite sex, then establish sensible, sensitive guidelines. Some couples rule out lunch with a coworker, traveling together, talking alone behind closed doors, sharing rides, or working as a “couple” on a project. Agree on what you both consider reasonable, then stick to that agreement. If you’re faced with a situation that you haven’t discussed, ask your spouse about it beforehand, and if he or she isn’t comfortable with it, don’t do it. Listen to each other’s concerns. The Lord has made you “one flesh” for good reason.
At first it may seem strange to ask for permission to take part in what’s probably a completely innocent activity. But you’ll quickly discover how wonderfully reassuring it feels when the situation is reversed and your partner is the one asking you!
Just between us…
- Are you comfortable with my behavior around members of the opposite sex?
- Is there anything I should do differently?
- Are we praying enough that God would protect us from temptation? What does Proverbs 6:28 mean to you?
Dear God, we want to protect our marriage from any threat. We want to live freely and securely as a result of having chosen to live wisely. By Your Spirit, show us how to honor each other and please You. Amen.
- From Night Light For Couples, by Dr. James & Shirley Dobson
Copyright © 2000 by James Dobson, Inc. All rights reserved.